Wednesday, March 11, 2009

The gossip column. It's back, but this time... it's the TRUTH.

#1 Phil Zajicek recently won the Metro State Roadrunner TT in Morrison CO with a broken wrist. Little known fact... his cast was put on in the wind tunnel to ensure it's aerodynamic qualities. The thing is actually faster in the crosswinds like a Sub 9. Aerodynamic guru Steve Hed was called in to make sure the setting was done correctly in the wind tunnel, and after Sunday's TT effort he was quoted as saying, "This thing is so fast, probably cut 1.16 second off Phil's time." Phil's time without the cast - 19:51, approximately one second slower than Corey Carlson.

#2 A certain local professional cyclist has recently gotten SRM to program an alarm into his power meter so a "beeping noise" goes off when a certain wattage is achieved. This was done to ensure he doesn't break any more bones by throwing down too hard.

#3 Another aerodynamic tidbit. Dan Porter spent a few hours in the wind tunnel this winter and found that although his larger than normal calves (cows) can produce a ton of power, and the mere sight of them can scare people off his wheel, they are in fact quite an aerodynamic obstruction. To smoothen things up, Steve Hed was once again called in, and recommended Dan mount a small instrument to his handlebars that acts like the dimples on a golf ball, creating a stream of ultra-turbulent air that allows Dan's cow to slip through the surrounding air without increasing his aerodynamic drag. The instrument is pointed out by the arrow below, the turbulent air-stream is also visible. Dan claims it's for some crazy new web-developing-business venture he's into. Likely story.

#4 Floyd Landis was innocent. I just read his book, trust me.

#5 Tyler probably was too.

#6 Now that the elderly population of women in Boulder have stopped paying attention to him, a certain Mr. Ryan Hamity has decided to start racing bikes again to see if he can catch the eyes of the over 35 population again.

That's all for now, there is sure to be more juicy TRUE gossip as the year goes on.
Thanks for checking in.

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